May 24, 2024

Newsletter #294 - The ETH ETF & Other Market Shenanigans

Hi Shitcoiners,

Your portfolio is likely up this week! However, for some, it will be up more than others. Many Ethereum holders didn’t lose hope that an ETF announcement was on the horizon and it finally came through.

A quick side note, there will be no further comments from the SEC.

But there will be plenty of complaining that the price isn’t going up enough.

Never the less, we just keep winning.

If you fancy yourself as a bit of trader, then you will have been keeping an eye on the ETH/BTC chart. It has been brutal for a few months, some might even say the best torture device of 2024.

Everyone wants the alpha. Those who watch the Steady Lads podcast could have timed this to perfection. 0xWangarian, take a bow.

While some funds make money, others lose. Remember when Su lost 10 billion dollars?

Anyway, back to Ethereum. Do you remember when Saylor said there was no way in hell an Ethereum ETF would be approved? RIP.

If Saylor can do or say nothing wrong in your eyes, we have the device for you.

We will just leave this here.

We didn’t mean for that segment to become a Saylor bashing. It’s only light teasing, we promise. He does ship some uplifting, inspiring content from time to time. Here’s a man with a Bitcoin flag on Everest.

A new version of Bitcoin Core just dropped!

And Bitcoin is becoming a large part of the race for to The White House. Trump made the first move and now accepts Bitcoin and crypto donations. Bullish?

It’s not looking good for grandpa Biden.

But it’s not over yet. Screw the student loans, let’s kickstart alt szn and get the zoomers onboard. Biden, you know what to do.

It’s a tough audience to capture though when the opposition have memes like this.

Nic Carter waded in this week to tell you not to be fooled.

In other Nic Carter news, his fight with David Hoffman is off!

For those of you interesting in some high IQ longer reading, then Cobie has dropped a new post. The industry seems obsessed low float/high FDV. Read all about it in this latest hit piece.

The Eigen Layer launch has been discussed endlessly. Now the dust is settling and we await those unlocked tokens, many are wondering how we all got so bullish on restaking. It all adds up when you think about it.

It’s hard to believe receiving “a significant amount of tokens” doesn’t affect your stance. Let’s all become advisors!

One man probably not in the running for an advisory position is Tabasco. This is unconfirmed, but big if true.

Do you remember how FTX was instrumental in the first Solana run, and instrumental in the tokens extreme bear market? We do. Well some are saying Solana Summer might be here. Taylor thinks it’s coming.

Ah, the exuberance of new market participants. Meanwhile the rest of you degen’ing into obscure Solana shitcoins are sitting there waiting for the dev to do something.

In other Solana news, remember STACCoverflow who stole from Turns out he may be in custody.

Ansem has become a main character of the cycle. With his follower count comes some strange perks, such as asking for contact information of random girls in swimming pools. We aren’t sure if this is creepy or an amazing use of your audience.

Either way, CT gotchu fam. We are a resourceful bunch.


With this new generation of crypto users being autistic AF, some things are becoming clear.

Here’s a photo of a Monero!

Are you looking for the latest fashion but have no idea which brands are in? Milady has you covered.

But this is probably not the time for shopping. Max thinks it’s time to delete the unnecessary expenses.

According to Gabriel, this industry is getting out of control. Bring back the good old days!

Or seek progress instead. We will evolve from skill-based gambling and become slot machine connoisseurs.

As we near the end of this newsletter, we have some sad news. Kabosu has passed away. RIP.

Thank you for joining us this week. It has been a pleasure as always. Have a great weekend.