Newsletter #290 - Retardio

Hey Shitcoiners,

‍

Welcome to another edition of the spiciest newsletter on the internet. There were several newsworthy situations this week but we think we can all agree that the most hilarious of them all was the Polymarket “retardio” incident. Curious about what the deleted tweet was? The intern was trying to get the Phantom intern on the team.

‍

We soon learned that Hugo Martingale was the intern in question. Susan from HR was not happy. She was on the case.

‍

Polymarket issued a statement and announced that Hugo had been fired.

‍

RIP.

‍

All would not be lost for young Hugo however. In the name of free speech, @trading_axe would offer him $500k for his troubles. What a champ.

‍

Hugo wouldn’t accept, but would be finely rewarded for his shitposting.

‍

After the overwhelming support from crypto Twitter, Susan would come crawling back. Now that's retardio.

‍

A lot happened in two hours. Here are a couple of tweets to get you up to speed.

‍

Could Polymarket be saved? Maybe if they sold the business and rehired the intern. Polymarket went on the offensive and rebuffed the offer.

‍

Inversebrah.

‍

But wait, you thought that was it? Susan is making her comeback! She hears you all loud and clear.

‍

To other news now. Last week visitors to Dubai were met with flooding on a biblical scale. The horror stories would flow. However, there was one event that would cheer them up. Crypto Fight Night.

‍

Ansem got in the ring with Barney, but it turns out that being on a several day bender doesn’t help your chances of a knockout.

‍

Here is some next level content.

‍

Ansem’s character arc is developing by the day. He now receives comments from Snowden.

‍

However, he is not a fan of you calling him a Key Opinion Leader. Degenerate seems more fitting.

‍

How has Solana been for you this month? Jmo’s experience should be on the news!

‍

To more serious developments. In a blow to crypto privacy, the founders of Samourai Wallet have been arrested and charged with money laundering.

‍

The US are coming down hard on the industry, but the big players are fighting back. Consensys are on the offensive.

‍

Joe Lubin was like - hold up.

‍

It’s all looking a little desperate from the SEC.

‍

The US government are only trying to protect you! Word on the grapevine is that they are trying to send CZ to prion for 3 years.

‍

They are also trying to collect a paycheck. $5.3B in fines could be on the way for Do Kwon. Yikes.

‍

Remember when Stripe had Bitcoin payments back in the day? Crypto payments will now be turned on again later this year.

‍

In other Bitcoin news, the “Buy Bitcoin” sign has been sold!

‍

Historic.

‍

CMS Holdings here with the witty comment on the news of the Strike European expansion.

‍

How are the ETFs looking? After 71 days of trading, BlackRock had their first day of zero inflows.

‍

When things are quiet in the market, it’s a good time to gloat about academic prowess. It turns out CL is an educated man.

‍

Where are we at in the market cycle? When crypto businesses start promoting polo events, it starts to look a bit more post than pre.

‍

We can only hope that Katy Perry doesn’t post any future photos with crypto personalities. It’s not looking good for Tesla.

‍

We round this one off with a an image from Ledger. We have no idea what we are looking at, but as Cobie mentioned, Ledger’s wife may or may not be trembling. It depends what she’s into.

‍

That's all for this week. Follow Andreas on Twitter and stay up to date with us @Shitcoindotcom too. See you next time.

‍

Team Shitcoin.com