November 3, 2022

Newsletter #210 - Crypto Illuminati

Yo Shitcoiners,

Did you miss us? After a week of recuperating from extended crypto degeneracy, we are back! Before we jump into the shenanigans of the last week check out the latest episode of The Show. It was a cracker.

Uptober was once penned by the infamous Zhu Su. The phrase only applied to years gone by, now we are in an extended period of Crabtobers.

It has been a rough year of neglected skincare.

Now every Monday we wake up, check CoinGecko and acknowledge we are significantly underwater.

Those zombie bags probably don’t help!

After an extended spell of PVP in the markets, Kevin is putting out a battle call. This is a time for unity, APES UNITE!

Anyway, that’s enough optimism for now, back to the dumpster fire. Over in BNB-land, someone got hacked for $600M USD, sending the chain into meltdown.

It was so bad that BSC was paused, that’s so Solana of them! It’s not hard to pause it though when there’s only one person in control.

Do Kwon has been providing some amazing commentary following his addition to the Interpol red list. We haven’t seen someone so vocal on the run since John McAfee.

This guy is too busy coding in the living room to be trading shitcoins like the rest of you.

According to Do, this is all highly politicized. We strongly recommend clicking the tweet below and reading the comments. Get ready for comedy gold.

Eric Wall here to tell you to stop the obsession with sending Do Kwon to prison.

Do’s thumb is not thumb.

Celsius were one of the casualties of the LUNA collapse. We didn’t examine the terms and conditions of signing up to Celsius, but publishing a document listing your doxxed user’s holdings is one way to get them back on side!

The Celsius overlords do not give a shit about you.

In other news this week Kim Kardashian was ordered to pay $1.26M for shilling EthereumMax.

Any publicity of good publicity!

Following news that Gisele and Tom are splitting up get ready for Autism Capital storytime! It’s a compelling read that only a true autist could conjure.

We know whose fault this is.

Meanwhile over on BTC Eric was questioning whether Saylor has ever used Lightning.

Social media managers know how to farm engagement!

We are all down bad, but Frank is down really bad.

As is this 17-year-old who is massively underperforming.

As Ethereum people head to Bogota for Devcon, an amazing opportunity for locals is presenting itself!

You might have heard of this next darknet bust from 2020. For the juicy details read this next piece of Gary and Larry Harmon. Captivating stuff.

Ross Ulbricht is still behind bars for his alleged involvement in Silk Road. Here’s Eileen with her take.

As we prepare for the next bull, let’s take a look into the future.

If it doesn’t work out for you, just remember you were right.

That's all for this week. Follow Andreas on Twitter and stay up to date with us @Shitcoindotcom too. See you next time.