Shitcoin Newsletter #142 - Miami, ETH 2.0 and Rugs

June 4, 2021
Newsletter Archive

Hey Shitcoiners,

Bitcoiners and shitcoiners are gathering in Miami, Ethereum hodlers are asking “wen 2.0?” and scams and rugs are rife. In this week’s newsletter, we have plenty of stellar crypto content for you to peruse at your leisure.

Before we get to that, check out the latest episode of the Show with Jeff John Roberts, Executive Editor at Decrypt. He wrote the book on Coinbase, Kings of Crypto and had some interesting market insights. A solid weekend watch.

One topic we touched on in that interview was Elon. It appears the enigma’s stock is falling.

Did he really lead to the spike of CUMMIES? What reality are we living in?

The Supercycle everyone on Twitter keeps telling us about is definitely in question at this point. This market has a lot of you baffled.

If you do believe in the Supercycle then you might want to check out this next offer. Why not exchange a testicle for a Bitcoin? We have forwarded this to our sponsors,, maybe they’ll open up testicle-pegged BTC swaps. Please don’t ask questions about how that will work. It’s gross.

Peter Schiff loves to stick in the knife. He didn’t get the response he was looking for though on a recent poll.

This weekend Bitcoiners are flocking to Miami to talk shop, shitpost, and get busy with all sorts of degeneracy.

Paris Hilton will be in town to mingle. We are eagerly awaiting the photos of her and your favourite crypto personalities, who realise that she’s a bit of an OG and knows quite a bit about Bitcoin.

Playboy are also getting in on the action. Luke Dashjr however, does not want to be associated with sinners like that.

One attendee already soaking up the rays in Miami is Vitalik. He’s lapping up the lady attention.

We will just leave this link here…

We are sure Vitalik is going to get a lot of questions about ETH 2.0. Even he’s surprised about how it’s taking. We’re not.

Ethereum 2.0 stakers didn’t read the actual fine print. You are now community members forever. Your 32 ETH may never see the light of day.

If you’re worried about your bags, listen to Maren. Some sound advice from the stars here.

To exchanges. Binance have implemented a new feature to stop you being such a degenerate.

CZ doesn’t strike us as a guy who can’t afford multiple pairs of pants. He can buy the whole store. That doesn’t mean his daily struggles are unlike ours.

Meanwhile, at FTX/Alameda, Sam Trabucco is pwning all of the Alameda team at poker and then giving all of their money away.

Mandrik here with a little history for you.

Now to a little Bitcoin mining news. You may have seen our episode last week with Marshall Long, well in the next update it seems one of those miners is signalling for Taproot.

Ben called it.

Meanwhile, Ledger appears to sell your data off by default. Yikes.

Speaking of privacy, one of our favourite Monero wallets, Cake is sponsoring an MMA fighter!

That’s enough positive news for you. Time to shit on some XRP bag holders. Here’s Jed preparing to dump on you noobs.

Allison needs a guy like Jed. Cred did not want to take her up on her offer.

To an “exploit”. Belt Finance has seen $6 million of funds moved out of their control.

It doesn’t help that this is the state of DeFi.

Screw rugpulls. Why don’t you actually pick up a real rug with Majin?

Majin has been talking about his combo of NFTs and rugs for a while. He’s a little late to the game though if you cite the following mention of “crypto trading cards” in 1993 from Hal Finney.

Back to the rugs. Sorry, not rugs, this is just one guy getting absolutely rekt.

Did he buy Doge at the top?

Nassim Nicholas Taleb has been causing a stir as he appeared in the lineup at an upcoming CoinGeek conference alongside Roubini, Craig and some other “interesting” speakers.

We joke, Hitler, Mugabe and Saddam Hussein aren’t speaking, they’re dead. We are wondering if Kim Jong-un will be making an appearance though. Whoever does show up, it’s likely not a good look for Nassim. Matthew Graham called him out.

Dan Dark Pill with a special announcement.

Remember to Follow Andreas on Twitter and stay up to date with us @Shitcoindotcom too.


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